Monday, May 11, 2009
Mother's Day ( a day late :-)
I woke up to a WONDERFUL mothers day - breakfast in bed, flowers, a jewelry box, stepping stone, a necklace, cards and an Applebees gift card...the best gift was spending the morning with my wonderful kids!!! Michael came to church and went to lunch with us - we had a very good time!
It was rough celebrating this mothers day without my momma but we stopped by and placed flowers on her grave. On the 27th of this month she will be gone a year. I miss her!!!
Since my moms death, I've been trying to determine "WHAT" my purpose in this world/life is all about. I think I've finally figured it out, I always wanted us to "go" and be missionaries but I feel like the Lord is teaching me that my "children" are my mission field. They are my gifts from God, if we minister to the world but our children go to hell, what does it profit us?
I have been asking the Lord alot lately to change me and help me to be a better mom. My relationship with my daughter seems strained most of the time and I want it to be so much more kind and loving than it is. Unfortunately, my mom didn't have an interest in kids (her own or her grandchildren) until she was sick and it was too late at that point to try to redo or undo a life of difficulties...I don't want that with my daughter. I vow to break this bondage in Jesus name (with the help of prayer and the Lord :-)
I love you Lord and thank you for the AWESOME kids that you have given me and pray that you will continue to bring me from glory to glory in raising my kids. Please Lord make me a better mom. I love you Lord!!!